seems i'm getting out of control . feels like i'm running out of soul . i'm seeing lights . so i speaking right and breathing life . i predicted all my recent plights . i'm exhausted . trying to fall asleep . i'm lost inside my recent fight . it burdens on my shoulder, now . burning all my motors down . inspiration drying up . motivation slowing down . tired of all wardrobe changing . playing all these different spirits . living off these separate souls . point of life is getting hollow . can't wait for the exit hole . give me room to entry wound . let me in or let me go .

Oct 27, 2010

tomorrow


it's about tomorrow afta i went out with bob, i went out once more, but with whom? with cidan.. his name is actually shahidan, but i used 2 call him as cidan, he was my past ex. he left me for another girl.. i knew the girl.. a person who took him from me, but it's okay, i didn't suffer 4 that things anymore. n now.. he's already forgiven.. well.. i dun love u anymore.. tanxs GOD  :)

             he pick me up at 1.30, we spent time to lunch together, karaoke, bowling, toddle around the town, bought few item at megamall, watch horror muvi, "THE CHILD'S EYE" enjoying car racing games, netball (twice) hehe.. then.. we got rest on DP's field, he bot me 'jagung kukus' we talk n laugh..  n lastly, we took our dinner b4 going back. hmm... he was so nice 2 me.. sometimes i wonder y all my past exes tryin 2 be so nice 2 me?? 4get dat~

             i can see the honesty thru his eyes, his sincerity thru his attitude, yah~ ppl changed.. but it's too late rite.. i dun hv any feelings toward him (even a bit)..  he's handsome, nice, generous n cool~ wut else.. somehow i feel like i  juz let go of the past, dun wan 2 look back. i juz feel pleasant 4 being his fren..

evaluate his attitude :

* he paid all those things 4 me ( the cost 4 the day) i want to pay 4 some certain things we did on dat day but he prevent!

* he bought me a pop corn set combo 3, it's enuf right? but he still want 2 buy twisties n other item 4 me, but i refused. ouh dun act dat fucking nice 2 me, 'cuz i dun want dat.

*15 minutes b4 we entering cinema, i had spilled the water.. luckily he dint act angry n says something offensive.he's kinda cool, he took the plastic bag from me, brought it 2 the trash container, n clean wut shud be cleaned, then he asked me 2 hold the drink n popcorn, while he go 4 getting a new plastic bag and buy a new drink for me. i felt a bit guilty :( while he still remain cool all the time~ huhu

*on the way back 2 the house, we're stuck in traffic jams, damt it!~ about an hour n half. but he still was very cool~ huhu.. he keep askin' me whether i am tired? sleepy? tired?? bored? tired?? sleepy ?? i am not! didn't i suppose 2 ask him dat rite?? 'cuz he's driving,, he's tired.. lol~ dun treat me like a princess. i'm okay.. i'm juz an ordinary ppl~

*we lost in the path! it's all bcoz of me... i gave a wrong direction 2 him. hehe.... after he cross the shortcut way (2 avoid traffic congestion) we are suddenly locate at masjid tanah area.. huhu... we stopped 4 dinner at the restaurant, afta dat, with confidence, I gave the wrong road signage 2 him. OMG... we're suddenly at klebang, way out 2 the town.. once again.. i've been troubling him.. so sory huh,, but he still keep it calm, act professionally 2 find the way 2 my house at Lendu ;) n i'm finally home! :D


pix cidan with his ex (faz yg ala2 fauziah ghous)

THANKS 4 EVERYTHING..

urm... tomorrow's mornin' afta the day, he text me sounds like diz " tanxs su.. sbb lastly su nk jgk kuar ngn cidan lg, ssh btul kn.. slalunya ada je alsn, cidan hepy sgt dpt kuar ngan su... emm.. su nk jadi gf cidan? cidan still syg su lg la" then i replied him, explain to him abt somethin', n everything.. n ya... probably 'coz i broke his heart with my answer n explanation, he choose 2 resigned from me, n i do hope dat he will get a better person in the next future :) " i juz fulfill ur desire 2 spend time with me once.  n i admit i had a great time with ya~ i really appreciate it.hah! congrats babe!  i'm hepy with ur changes in term of ur attitude n the way u treat me. obviously complete! i wish u luck in ur life... " well..  i guess he knew my feelings towards him is juz as a fren~ nothing more than dat