seems i'm getting out of control . feels like i'm running out of soul . i'm seeing lights . so i speaking right and breathing life . i predicted all my recent plights . i'm exhausted . trying to fall asleep . i'm lost inside my recent fight . it burdens on my shoulder, now . burning all my motors down . inspiration drying up . motivation slowing down . tired of all wardrobe changing . playing all these different spirits . living off these separate souls . point of life is getting hollow . can't wait for the exit hole . give me room to entry wound . let me in or let me go .

Sep 29, 2010

back to normal

i met haky n cindy just now.. it was like......... :) i'm happy, maybe sbb dpt lpskn rndu kutt sbb naik cuti , arini larh br jumpa.

ouh,, x larat nk crta. mo tdur dlu. :D

 
a gift for cindy,, from mumma.. huhu :)

 
bola2 api for papa cindy,, hehehe <3

Sep 28, 2010

wanita

:HATI SEORG WANITA:

1.Bila sorang wanita mengatakan dia sedang bersedih,tetapi dia tidak menitiskan airmata,itu bermakna dia sedang menangis di dalam hatinya. 

2.Bila dia tidak menghiraukan kamu selepas kamu menyakiti hatinya, lebih baik kamu beri dia masa untuk menenangkan hatinya semula sebelum kamu menegur dengan ucapan maaf. 

3.wanita sukar nak cari benda yang dia benci tentang orang yang paling dia sayang(sebab itu ramai wanita yang patah hati bila hubungan itu putus di tengah jalan). 

4.Sekiranya sorang wanita jatuh cinta dengan sorang lelaki, lelaki itu akan sentiasa ada di fikirannya walaupun ketika dia sedang keluar dengan lelaki lain. 

5.Bila lelaki yang dia suka dan cinta merenung tajam ke dalam matanya,dia akan cair seperti coklat!! 

6.wanita memang sukakan pujian tetapi selalu tidak tau macam mana nak menerima pujian. 

7.Jika kamu tidak suka dengan wanita yang sukakan kamu separuh mati,tolak cintanya dengan lembut,jangan berkasar sebab ada satu semangat dalam diri wanita yang kamu tak akan tahu bila dia dah buat keputusan,dia akan lakukan apa saja. 

8.Sekiranya seorang gadis mula menjauhkan diri darimu selepas kamu tolak cintanya,biarkan dia untuk seketika.Sekiranya kamu masih ingin menganggap dia seorang kawan,cubalah tegur dia perlahan-lahan. 

9.wanita suka meluahkan apa yang mereka rasa.Muzik,puisi, lukisan dan tulisan adalah cara termudah mereka meluahkan isi hati mereka. 

10.Jangan sesekali beritahu wanita yang mereka ni langsung tak berguna 

11.Bersikap terlalu xambil kisah boleh mematikan mood wanita. 

12.Bila pertama kali lelaki yang dicintainya dalam diam memberikan respon positif,misalnya menghubunginya melalui telefon,si gadis akan bersikap acuh tak acuh seolah-olah tidak berminat,tetapi sebaik saja ganggang diletakkan,dia akan menjerit kesukaan dan tak sampai sepuluh minit,semua rakan-rakannya akan tahu berita tersebut. 

13.Sekuntum senyuman memberi seribu erti bagi wanita.Jadi jangan senyum sebarangan. 14.Jika kamu menyukai sorang wanita,cubalah mulakan dengan persahabatan. Kemudian biarkan dia mengenalimu dengan lebih mendalam. 

15.Jika sorang wanita memberi seribu satu alasan setiap kali kamu ajak keluar,tinggalkan dia sebab dia memang tak berminat denganmu. 

16.Tetapi jika dalam masa yang sama dia menghubungimu atau menunggu panggilan darimu,teruskan usahamu untuk memikatnya. 

17.Jangan sesekali mengagak apa yang dirasakannya. Tanya dia sendiri!!
18.Selepas sorang gadis jatuh cinta,dia akan sering tertanya-tanya kenapalah aku tak jumpa lelaki ini lebih awal. 

19.Kalau kamu masih tercari-cari cara yang paling romantik untuk memikat hati sorang wanita,cubalah rajin-rajinkan tangan menyelak buku-buku cinta. 

20.Bila setiap kali gambar kelas keluar,benda pertama yang dicari oleh wanita ialah siapa yang berdiri di sebelah buah hatinya, kemudian barulah dirinya sendiri. 

21.Bekas teman lelaki akan sentiasa ada di fikirannya tetapi lelaki yang dicintainya sekarang akan berada di tempat teristimewa iaitu di hatinya!! 

22.Satu ucapan ‘WOI’ sahaja sudah cukup menceriakan harinya. 

23.Teman baiknya saja yang tahu apa yang sedang dia rasa dan lalui. 

24.wanita paling benci lelaki yang berbaik-baik dengan mereka semata-mata nak tackle kawan mereka yang paling cantik. 

25.Cinta bermaksud kesetiaan, ambil berat, jujur dan kebahagiaan tanpa sebarang kompromi.
26.Semua wanita mahukan sorang lelaki yang cintakan mereka sepenuh hati.. 

27.Senjata wanita adalah airmata!!
28.wanita suka jika sesekali orang yang disayanginya mengadakan surprise buatnya(hadiah, bunga atau sekadar kad ucapan romantis). Mereka akan rasa terharu dan merasakan bahawa dirinya dicintai setulus hati.Dengan ini dia tak akan ragu-ragu terhadapmu. 

29.wanita mudah jatuh hati pada lelaki yang ambil berat tentang mereka dan baik terhadapnya. So,kalau nak memikat wanita pandai-pandailah... 

30.Sebenarnya mudah mengambil hati wanita kerana apa yang dia mahu hanyalah perasaan dicintai dan disayangi sepenuh jiwa.. -END 

so kaum2 adam dalami lah hati seorang wanita... cinta itu sakit sgt...

poem 4 today :)

The Chaotic Mind

The Chaotic Mind is a human mind,
Layers of mysteries upon layers of wonder,
The mind is complex, the people say,
It is living,
It’s a computer,
It’s a marvel.

It won’t be told what to do,
It continues with its absurd thoughts,
Long after it is asleep, it continues to think,
To think of mysteries, of stories, of poems,
It streams through nonsense,
Through life,
Through logic,
Through unbelievables,

It continues to shock, to amaze those around it,
It continues to think,
Of life,
Of solving,
Of wonder,

All through it’s life it runs full stride,
a mass of whirling emotion and questions
but like all races, this one has an end,
a mind will only finish it’s race once,
Then it is through,
No more competing,
No more thinking,

Because the race is through.
But oh what a run it had!
Oh what a race was run!

And in it’s place a dozen more minds race,
powered by the rushing wind
of all the minds that ran before,
and those that run alongside.

asking alexandria

Current members
Asking Alexandria is a metalcore band from York, North Yorkshire, England. Founded in 2008 when Ben Bruce (lead guitar) contacted old friends after moving back to England from Dubai, the current line-up consists of Ben Bruce, Danny Worsnop (vocals), Cameron Liddell (rhythm guitar), Sam Bettley (bass guitar) and James Cassells (drums).




here was their official video of  'final episode', intro with Alerion~ woOt2~ :D

1.You start 2 listening metalcore n screamo stuff

2.You hear oli sykes n andy sixx, n more screamers, n think they're good, or amazing, or whatever...

3.Than you hear fuckin' asking alexandria and just feel like OH.MY.GOD! they were so AMAZING!

*And if u think they're "emo faggots", u should see one of their concerts, how the "emo faggots" moshing the crap out of each other... ; D  This is the most generic band i've ever heard.


unwell feeling..

 
i'm not fakin' my smile am i rite?

sigh*... Recently, he's being nice 2 me, yah~ thru text messenger.. seems like... uhh,, no, i hv no idea 'bout diz. i'm happy when he said i love you nicely, but my heart is currently bleeding. no, i dun even know wut has happened 2 me right now, is like i'm not me. . when replying him 'i love you too',  my heart is still in a sick condition. "WHY?WHAT?HOW?" Wut the silly things i'm talkin' about? kick me ! lol~ it's juz like i wanna cry at the moment i replied him. i can't describe my feeling's.. damn great @-@..i'm not crying, is like my heart is crying, what i'm thinking of in my mind?? it was juz a trivial matter actually.. i'm afraid if your love was not the same.i'm getting weak? fuck! i wOn't~  i'm trying to be nice too, i'm trying not to show my heartache, despite the pain inside,i'll do anything 2 relieve my heart n 2 create smile on my lips,   wut else.. ahahh.. *breath slow..

*actually apa yg "pain", apa yg sakit sgt?? idk~ but hati aq mmg tgh rasa sakit, even apalah sangat pun, tp dh mmg rsa sakit, so how? heyy.. come on naswa.. apa nihh,, duhh, shit la. hope 2morrow i would feel better.i'm hopin' dat my smile wouldn't be fake anymore.i got to remember dat anything happens 4 a reason,whether good or bad..  love is not abt hepy n sweet feelings, its also hurts 4 sometimes,  u juz hv 2 deal with it :)

Sep 27, 2010

happy outside, inside??

:) huhu.. tired. ouh ya~ luckily! yesterday and today was an AWW-SOME day. Finally, kayrol fulfill his promise 2 bring me out 2 hv some fun around kl n s.alam on diz week. The reason's y i really need diz 'cause i'm feeling down, i need some entertainment to get a little happinesS 2 heal the pain inside.yah~ i hv 2 be strong 2 face all the sickness.. well, definitely, i mish muh brother..(kayrol). he's kinda cool anyway, i was pleased wif him,, :) ..i brought liyana (my roOmmate) along wif me 4 the journey, we took a bus to s.alam at 3.15 n it takes about 1 n half hours. the songs n rainy days along the journey makes me feel calm..
n yet, i still keep thinking of him wherever i go. eventho it hurts me so much, my feelings towards him was never fade away.yes,  i'm trying to let go the suspicion in my head n avoid 2 think the non~ huhh.. okay, coOl~ :)


it's about yesterday :D ( 24 sept )

 
arrived in station bus, shah alam around 5pm, tanxs liyana sbb teman alonx :)


 
tara!! huu..pix at the top was my bro (kayrol) .. he pick us up at 6 and carry us to "H.R steak house" at Kampung baru around the city to eat chicken chop. n yah !~ he paid for us.. :) hehe..  tp suma mkn x abis.. 'coz chicken n the sauce make us full~ kenyang sangat ouh.. lagi2, dia punya fries~ we're lingering there about 2 hours 4 lepaking n borak2~

*some crazy pix*



 
 
hahaha... tanxs sbb lynkn jak aq nihh.. juz 2 make me happy. lol~ :D


 
afta dat, he took us to s.a, as he promised 2 take us to i-city.. a place where there are a lot of light n hv a variety of unique lighting, lighted trees and many more~ i'll show some photos below.

i-city



 
 









do not 4get 2 my hubby, i bought him a "bola2 api". hehe..



today  ( 25 sept )

heyyy... yah~  awal pagi lg kayrol sda dtg pick kami d ruma kak diba, then trus pg  ruma kakak nazmi (zaty's bf) at bukit jalil. we've been invited by zaty 2 attend the banquet which considered as 'open house'. we didn't bring 'baju kurung' since we didn't plan these things directly, so we juz wore the clothes dat we had brought. haha.. yeah, here was some photos dat we took along the journey!~


teda pix larh d ruma zaty.. aq lupa mo tgkp pix. well.. mish c zaty 'lot!~

back from open house, we went to J.J 2 buy some items, aq jgk ada blikn cindy teddy bear..saja2.. 4 cindy n haky lorh actually. aq ada msuk 1 shop tuh, flower shop or wut idk~ i can't remember the name of dat shop. the smell inside the shop was very fragrant. dlm shop tuh ada bnyk bunga2.. wangi sangat2.. suka.. :) goods sold in the shops are all scented. the stuff inside is mostly in cream n white colour~ n aq sdh trtarik pada 1 little cute teddy in purple~ since the cost is not so expensive. so aq beli.. then aq senyum sendiri d c2, hahax


actually aq mo cri present utk zieqa since 2day is her bufday. n late nyte, i'm gonna meet her.. n i want 2 prepare a birthday present 4 her..so, i kept searching something different for her..Unfortunately, none of which I feel pleased.

afta dat, we move to the town , get into Time square..n yeah.. i bought ziqa a sweater 4 her bufday present :) at last... hahaha,, pnt sudah brjln.. we hang out in TS about 2 hours..maybe, can't remember lorh..  cuma ada 1 fto jak d TS. huhu.. still aq mo tnjuk nihh


ow yea,, i've bought cindy something ! i tell u wut hah..  i've been attracted with something when a walk in the mall. my eyes catch on something and i guess it's kinda cute lorh! n here's the thing! haha

it's a baby pants!~ lol. =D

guess wut is inside my head??? it is exactly cindy n papa cindy ! hahahaha.. kinda cute rite? huhu.. mmg lah cindy x blh pkai nih pants, tp it can be comforter or wuteva larh.. jnji aq sukak sgt dgn pants ney. hehe.. still i wanna said here, i luv cindy n also papa cindy. :) i miss them so owh damn much. hope nnt c haky kasi aq jumpa c cindy. :')

all our journey costs has been incurred by kayrol. tenkew so much bro.. he makes me happy. i admit i'm happy with him, he was the best bro eva~ ... he took us to the bus station in stadium bkt jalil at 9.15.. i felt sad all of sudden when i had to split up with him at that moment.yah~ I had the time greeting his hand, n also! Lyn has given something to keyrol, its like a keychain.


do not 4get, kayrol gave me something ! it was an 'ole-ole' .. he bought it when he worked outstation in Pahang last 2 month..here's the thing..


huhu... dats all.. aq sayang ko larh kayrol! :D dia baik sgt ouh.. :')

it's okay then..

Ziziee AnnArenept Haki: iya meyh sygg .wall sajaa .ngerti ngakk kamuu .haha .
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: ngAK ngerti..haha..how r u?
Ziziee AnnArenept Haki: im finee sajaa .hbu ?
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: woah..great..i ok je..baru lps gian
Ziziee AnnArenept Haki: gian aperr yaa . ?
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: ride biskal..best ride dlm ujan
Ziziee AnnArenept Haki: wht .so danger .
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: no pain..no gain la dear
Ziziee AnnArenept Haki: carefull always . ok .
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: wokey. you too. jgn main ujan
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: missyatoo. later i txt u. dun forget to rep k
Ziziee AnnArenept Haki: i dnt hve crdt loh .
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: lol ! hahaha. nvm la. later u txt me la.
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: i like wall to wall. hahha
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: oit..awl bgon.
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: wall to wall?
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: hahaha..mane ade mucuk la..wek..
Ziziee AnnArenept Haki: haha . muncet gler r.
Arenept HakiZiziee Ann: hahaha...muncet comeyl lor

*u both were so sweet, gudluck dear.. :] *
I'm a fucking stalker i admit dat, i can't seem to control myself whenever i felt insecure over something...or i stalked people who 2 me matters..i don't stalk random people..only those who are in particularly, maybe someone i adore, someone who inspires me, someone who i love..and lastly someone who i hate.. well asta, that's what u get when u let your heart win..that's what u get when u follow your feelings too much...

Sep 26, 2010

zieqa's bufday :D

 
me n zieqa

who's zieqa?? she's my fren, my besfren, my housemate, roOmmate, my angah (step siblings),my classmate, my twin,  n gonna be my practicalmate, hahahaha... yesterday was her's birthday [ 25sept ] , while i'm 29may! huhu,, its upside down rite? hehex.. yah~ i <3 her so much. i'll give the best wishes 4 her, may God simplify all dat she did, *may god bless her~ :) we juz celebrated her lastnyte, with secret recipe cake.. its juz like a small party involving the whole housemates. is it enuf 2 cheer up her day?? i hope so.. plus,each of us gave her a gift, its a common, but it comes from our sincerity.. tanxs 4 appreciate it.. :)


 
a cake..
  • Asta Mixa hehehehe,,, apsl glang kalerful alonx jd watak utama dlm neyh gmbr ni, huhu
    7 hours ago · · 1 personZieqa Kiera likes this.
  • Zieqa Kiera hahhahaa.. sbbnye muke sy sgt buruk ktike ini.. jd.. ltakkn perhtian dtempat len.. hahaha
    7 hours ago · ·
  • Asta Mixa aq jua bgitu.. lihatlah mukeku yg over hepy (kununnya) hahahaha
    5 hours ago · · 1 personLoading...
  • Zieqa Kiera hahahahaha.. muke penat+risaw+ngis+terharu+hepy+bhgie.. bermcm prasaan di dlm 1 mlm.. ahhaha
    about an hour ago · ·
 
a present from me :)

Sep 23, 2010

i miss cindy ;(

       just now, i asked haky 2 give me a chance 2 keep cindy 4 a few days..unfortunately, he refuse 2 do so.. i wonder..why does haky changed..it's kinda sadden 4 me 2 accept dat things.. i dwell on all the memories i once had with cindy..yah~ i miss cindy n also papa cindy *so much..  :'( how could u do this dear..  eu've changed a lot. i can feel it,dats the matter.. u don't feel the way i feel right now.. i dun even know wut u're doing now, while i'm here still remain sticking with u.. 'cuz i still keeping myself 2  loving u, i guess! hahah.. yah.. all these things been bugging me 2 express my feeling here, now..today.. yea..i'd never tell anybody'bout diz. my housemates keep asking me y they'd never heard me mention haky's name all diz weeks? wut happen to us? well..all i can do is juz answer it nicely, avoid to tell the actual matters happened n the actual feeling's of mine..  i'm tryin' 2 be more professional 2 face all these things. ouh~ okay, it's juz a small matter, huhu~ emm.. at least I feel relieved after writing here.  :) mishalot ouh cindy.

Definition of my heart now..


This emotional state is one of a complete range of emotions; mostly hurt and anger.
It has many stages, and the first is usually shock or denial. After this, and the words of your once beloved have sunken in, it will feel as if your heart is literally being ripped out. This is because you will experience pain such as a tightening in the chest, stabbing pains in the chest, very heavy breathing, and an increased heart rate. You may diagnose yourself with a panic attack, but this is usually not the case. For some period of time (usually a few days to a week) you will feel as if you have an extreme case of an anxiety, and you may not like the thought of eating, for every time you do, it seems that the food will come right back up. Lack of sleep is very common, and you may be convinced that you are suffering from insomnia. Tears and crying also play a major role, but after about a day you will find that you no longer have any more tears to cry.

Sep 21, 2010

harder than you know

currently listening 2 diz song.. emm.. the meaning doesn't related 2 anybody~





1.are we just lost in time, i wonder if your love's the same.

2.baby, dun talk to me, i'm trying to let go.. not loving u is harder then u know..

3.how can i miss u if u never would stay..

4. inside me now is only heartache n pain..

5.if u dont love me then, i guess i have to go..

6.i'm gonna miss u 'cause i love u baby..

*just a few sentences from the lyric.

???


NiEna ◐◡◐ apply diz pix as her default profile picture in FB? wut does it means??? yah~ i'm stalker. nothing much 2 say, cuz nothing much i knew~ok then~ as haky said 2 me lately, trust is an important.

damn.. i can't even sleep last nyte. i hated being sick !!  so i decided 2 skip the whole classes 4 today..  i felt uncomfortable with diz condition - hot body temperature, stuffy nose, sore throat, watery eyes, flu , lost appetite. Moreover, i have to submit my "sales n promotion" assignment by tomorrow,n also..* i had to prepared 4 my test tomorrows morning. its about Legislation  Aspect in travel Agency (LAW), n Entrepreneur (ETR), both of them are quite tough~ see?? 2 papers n am gOin 2 handle it....huhh..  [click unlike]. wut the hell is gOin on?? everything messed up. no, i can't handle it since my condition is getting worse,yah~ i'm feeling unwell.. But.. i'll try as gud as i can~

ahah, diz morning.. i asked ziqa 2 buy me panadols n soluble when she came back from the class, but she bought me a soluble n acti-fast, no.. i dun want dat acti-fast.. huhu.. i need panadol 2 reduce my body temperature.it's okay, i dun mind.. :) at noOn, i ordered izah 2 buy me panadols n 100plus as she wants 2 buy some stuff at the mini market. n when she came back , yeah i got the 100plus, but again.. she 4got 2 buy panadols.. its kinda saddens 4 me,, uhu,, but it's okay anyway, unlucky.. :) Well..luckily i hv them (housemates) with me..n also, lyn offered herself 2 brew hot water 4 me.. it's pretty nice aite.. but i said it's okay cuz i oredy take an oat with hot water b4 dat.. :)  tanxs lyn, izah, n ziqa..at least they tried 2 help me :) n i really appreciate dat.  <3